🌿 To Love Fully, Forgive Deeply: The Path to Peace Within and With Another

How ancient wisdom and modern insight reveal forgiveness as the root of lasting love.

"Love is an endless act of forgiveness. Forgiveness is an endless act of love." ~Rumi

Forgiveness often didn’t sit easily with me. Raised in a Catholic family, I learned to associate forgiveness with begging for mercy from a faceless stranger in a dark confession box and paying for pardon with a penance. And though the penance was never anything strenuous, confessing that I had mouthed back to my mother in a clumsy attempt of a nine-year-old to set boundaries left an imprint far deeper than any Hail Mary could ever erase.

And although Catholics profess to follow Jesus, I’ve always felt the shadow of an Old Testament law — an eye for an eye — still alive and well, echoing through generations, whispering that forgiveness is for the other, not for us. Yet as Emily Fletcher so eloquently puts — forgiveness is not taking someone off the hook, it is taking the hook out of our own heart.

My first taste of forgiveness as a tool to regain freedom came not from the Church but from the world of conscious living — through Vishen Lakhiani, founder of Mindvalley. Practicing his 6 Phase Meditation, still my favourite to this day, I discovered forgiveness as a portal to the next level of my own becoming. Already devoted to the path of personal growth, I was willing to forgive if it would propel me toward expansion and enlightenment. I was surprised by how often I had to forgive the same people — myself included — but as I’ve learned, everything is a journey. And what a beautiful, humbling journey it is.

Personally, I’ve found forgiveness to be one of the most profound gateways to peace of mind — and to the simple joy of being fully present in each moment.Through the practice of forgiveness, I’ve slowly released my hold on ex-partners and certain family members who once etched themselves into my memory in ways far from noble.

And if you think about it, memory is all associations — the brain effortlessly fires the same neural pathways when meeting someone new, especially in love. Without forgiveness, it’s far too easy to project an old wound onto a new heart. Isn’t it wiser to let go — so you’re not unconsciously inviting the ghost of your cheating ex into the sacred intimacy of a present-day kiss?

It becomes so much easier to truly live in the moment once you’ve made peace with the past. Forgiveness lightens the load — freeing you from the exhausting habit of mentally rewriting old scripts or fantasising about the perfect comeback. And perhaps most powerfully, it becomes easier to meet your own gaze in the mirror when you’ve learned to forgive yourself.

This realisation is echoed by both ancient wisdom and modern science. So I invite you now to come closer. Let’s look together into the roots of forgiveness — the sacred and the scientific — so we might finally lay old ghosts to rest, clear the skeletons from the closet, and make space for that bright, untarnished love that has been waiting, so patiently, to pour in.

🌿 Forgiveness in the Vedas

The Vedas — the oldest sacred texts of India — do not hold any text solely devoted to forgiveness. Yet forgiveness breathes through their vision of Dharma (righteousness) and Ahimsa (non-violence).

✨ Dharma: Living in alignment with Dharma means sustaining cosmic harmony. To harbour anger or resentment is to disturb this harmony — within yourself, within the great web of life. Forgiveness becomes an unspoken act of rebalancing the scales of your soul.

✨ Ahimsa: Blossoming more fully in later texts — like the Mahabharata, Jain, and Buddhist teachings — Ahimsa reminds us that to do no harm to others must also mean doing no harm to oneself through bitterness or hatred.

✨ Forgiveness as Self-Mastery: The Manusmriti — drawing on Vedic authority — names forgiveness (kshama) as one of the highest virtues of the wise. It is not weakness but an emblem of inner strength.

There is a Sanskrit saying worth inscribing on the walls of the heart:

“Kshama virasya bhushanam.”Forgiveness is the ornament of the brave.

In this Vedic vision, forgiveness is spiritual courage — aligning the soul with the quiet, steady rhythm of the cosmos.

🕊️ Paramahansa Yogananda on Forgiveness

Paramahansa Yogananda, the beloved yogi who carried Kriya Yoga to the West, spoke of forgiveness not just as a virtue but as a living key to freedom — both practical and mystical.

✨ Forgiveness frees you. Yogananda taught that resentment binds your mind to what you wish to escape. To forgive is to drop the burden that poisons your heart.

“Forgive everyone for everything. To forgive is not to condone, but to release.”

✨ Forgive yourself, too. He reminded seekers that self-forgiveness is vital. Guilt chains the mind and blocks divine love. To forgive yourself is to open the heart to the vast wellspring of grace.

✨ Love is the greatest power. Forgiveness, for Yogananda, was a channel through which Divine Love dissolves the illusion of separation and bitterness.

✨ Practice it. To do so he encouraged simple prayers and meditations.

“I forgive those who have hurt me, and I ask forgiveness of all whom I have hurt.”

To sit quietly and truly feel this in the heart is not mere morality — it is a mystical act that untangles karma and restores unity.

🌙 Jesus Through Gnostic Eyes

Jesus is one of humanity’s greatest teachers of forgiveness and beyond the pages of the New Testament, the Gnostic Gospels and the sacred teachings of Mary Magdalene offer a more hidden doorway to his living wisdom.

📜 Why the Gnostics?Texts like The Gospel of Thomas, The Gospel of Mary Magdalene, and The Gospel of Philip reveal Jesus not as a distant redeemer but as an intimate awakener calling you to remember the light already within you. Forgiveness within the Gnostic texts is not blind obedience but self-liberation — the quiet dissolving of illusions that bind the soul.

🌹 Mary Magdalene: Apostle of the HeartIn The Gospel of Mary Magdalene, we meet forgiveness not as doctrine but as an act of radical self-remembrance. Mary teaches the others that sin is not a permanent stain but a veil of ignorance that makes us forget our true nature. To forgive is to lift the veil and remember the soul’s origin.

One striking passage shows her guiding human souls through the shadows of fear, wrath, ignorance and dissolving them through gnosis — inner knowing.

✨ A Gnostic Glimpse:

“Attachment to matter gives rise to passion against nature. Thus trouble arises in the whole body; this is why I tell you: ‘Be in harmony… do not be ignorant of yourselves.’” — Gospel of Mary Magdalene

And from The Gospel of Thomas:

“If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you.If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.” (Thomas 70)

Here, forgiveness is the act of bringing to light that which is hidden, usually from fear, guilt or shame, and dissolving it with love and compassion.

For seekers:

✨ The Gospel of Mary Magdalene — Jean-Yves Leloup’s translation is exquisite.

✨ The Gospel of Thomas — Leloup or Marvin Meyer are both deeply nourishing.

✨ Elaine Pagels’ The Gnostic Gospels — for gentle context.

🧬 The Science Meets the Sacred

Today’s fields of neuroscience and psychoneuroimmunology echo these timeless truths. Resentment and old anger keep the body in a storm of stress hormones — cortisol, adrenaline — that weaken immunity, strain the heart and light up the same pain circuits as a physical wound.

In contrast, forgiveness soothes the nervous system. fMRI scans show that forgiving shifts brain activity from the threat-focused amygdala to the calm, compassionate prefrontal cortex — the part that softens fear and awakens empathy.

Louise Hay, the pioneering teacher who showed millions how to heal through affirmations, reminded us that “forgiveness is for yourself because it frees you.” She said that clinging to resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to suffer. Her radical yet gentle invitation — “I forgive you and I set you free” — has become a mantra for people reclaiming their energy from old hurts.

In this same spirit, modern meditation teacher Emily Fletcher, founder of Ziva Meditation, has made forgiveness an accessible daily ritual. In her guided meditations, she invites us to close our eyes, see the person who hurt us and gently witness the story. Then, through a subtle shift, she guides us to see that person as a child — softening the narrative and loosening the grip of blame. For Emily, forgiveness is not about excusing harm but unhooking ourselves from the repetitive stress cycle that old wounds perpetuate. In that gentle vision, blame loosens its grip. The story shifts. The hook comes out.

This ancient wisdom finds surprising echoes in cutting-edge experiments too. One striking story comes from an experiment shared by Vishen Lakhiani, founder of Mindvalley, who stands at the crossroads of timeless spiritual insight and modern biohacking. In a brainwave study, researchers were measuring the brain states of people as they meditated — tracking the deep alpha and theta waves usually found in seasoned monks after many years of training. To their astonishment, one woman dropped into these rare states of deep calm within minutes. Curious, they asked her what advanced meditation she was using. Her answer was simple yet profoundly telling: “I was practicing forgiveness.”

In that moment, the science spoke the same language as the mystics: forgiveness is not just an ethical act, it is a neurological key — a switch that calms the storm of the mind and invites the body into the deep states of rest and restoration where healing begins.

🌟 May This Be Your Doorway

Forgiveness is not about forgetting and nor is it about condoning. It is a gift to yourself — a medicine for the mind, a balm for the body, a quiet and beautiful revolution for the heart.

As you read this, may you notice the faint whisper of an old grudge or hidden ache still lingering. May your next breath, your next soft exhale, your next kind word to yourself be the first opening to set yourself free.

Whether you’re on the path of calling in your Soul Mate or have been walking alongside your beloved for many years, forgiveness remains one of the enduring cornerstones of a loving, lasting relationship.

I’m not suggesting we become careless with our hearts — or the hearts of those we love. As humans, we sometimes act without full awareness of the consequences, and this is part of the human condition. But forgiveness doesn’t mean allowing harm to repeat itself. It is not about turning a blind eye or being taken for a fool. It is entirely okay — and often necessary — to release those who repeatedly violate your trust, not from bitterness, but from self-respect. To forgive does not mean to stay. Sometimes, forgiveness is what allows you to leave with grace.

What I am advocating for is discernment, compassion, and grace — for others, yes, but just as importantly, for yourself. Forgiveness is not about excusing harm, but about choosing freedom. It is the sacred art of keeping your heart soft without letting it be trampled upon— the quiet strength of love without self-abandonment.

So may your forgiveness be wise, your boundaries loving, and your heart ever open to the kind of love that honours both your softness and your strength.

The Soul Mate you call in is your mirror, your match in spirit — and if you’ve done the inner work of forgiving, chances are, so have they. Forgiving people are not naïve or untouched by pain; they’ve walked through fire, often shaped by those who challenged their hearts the most. And yet, instead of hardening, they chose grace. They chose compassion. So when two forgiving souls meet, it becomes a sanctuary — a love not built on perfection, but on presence, patience, and the quiet knowing that no one arrives without scars… only with the willingness to keep the heart open anyway.

When you become a forgiving person, you don’t just heal your past — you begin to shape your future.

🕊️ Forgiveness Invocation

May I forgive the shadows I have cast upon myself.

May I forgive the shadows others have cast upon me.

May I remember the light I am, and the light I see in all beings.

May this remembrance set us free.